Well my fellow Canadians, here we are again eh!—another slick-talking, self-righteous saviour swoops in to lead us into the promised land of progressive utopia. Meet Mark Carney, our freshly minted Prime Minister as of March 14, 2025, a man who’s spent his life climbing the greasy pole of finance and now thinks he’s Moses parting the Red Sea of carbon emissions. Sound familiar? It should. He’s Justin Trudeau 2.0, just with better suits and a resume that screams “I’ve dined with the global elite while you peasants fought over grocery bills.” After a decade of Trudeau’s sanctimonious circus, you’d think we’d have learned our lesson. Apparently not. Same team, same playbook—just a few new faces to mask the stench of the old, extreme, virtuous rot. And if we let this guy stay in power, we’re begging for a rerun of the last ten years, only now with a side of war-mongering and climate theater that’d make Al Gore blush. He is out for himself and nobody else, days after Trump announced tariffs he moved one of his companies out of Canada and down into the US. How’s that for “I got your back?”
Let’s start with the obvious: Carney’s a walking conflict of interest. This isn’t some conspiracy cooked up in a basement with tinfoil hats, it’s right there in the open, like a bloody neon sign flashing “I’m compromised, eh?” He spent years at Brookfield Asset Management, pocketing stock options that could be worth $9 million, all while preaching the gospel of ESG Environmental, Social, and Governance, for those who don’t speak corporate sanctimony. Now that he’s PM, his assets are in a blind trust, which is about as reassuring as handing your kid’s college fund to a Vegas slot machine, or as I call it a shit show! The Conservatives and NDP are screaming for transparency, hell, even the ethics commissioner’s raising an eyebrow, but Carney’s response? A snippy “look inside yourself” to a reporter who dared ask. Really, Mark? Look inside ourselves? How about you look inside your bank account and tell us how you’re not still tethered to the very companies you’ll be regulating? It’s like the who is Randy things all over again. Brookfield’s dodged billions in taxes, shuffled off to New York, and you expect us to believe you’re clean as a whistle? Please. This guy’s got more strings attached than a marionette at a puppet show.
And then there’s his net zero obsession—his personal crusade to save the planet while conveniently ignoring the mess he’s made along the way. Carney’s the poster boy for climate virtue, strutting around with the UN as their Special Envoy on Climate Action, telling us it’s the “greatest commercial opportunity of our time.” Sounds noble, right? Until you dig into his Brookfield days, where he claimed their $575 billion portfolio was “net zero” by juggling fossil fuel emissions with “avoided emissions” from renewables. Experts—real ones, not the ones nodding along at Davos—call it bullshit. Bill Hare from Climate Analytics says it’s not Paris Agreement-compliant; Wolfgang Kuhn from ShareAction calls it a “giant carbon Ponzi scheme.” Brookfield’s got stakes in coal terminals, oil sands, and gas pipelines—dirty as hell—yet Carney’s out there peddling this as green gospel. It’s not science; it’s theater, a stage play for the woke elite while the rest of us choke on carbon taxes he now claims he’ll scrap. Sure, Mark, scrap the consumer tax but keep the industrial one—same old Liberal shell game. Didn’t we see this with Trudeau? Promise the moon, deliver a landfill?
Speaking of Trudeau, let’s not kid ourselves—this is the same crew, just with a new frontman. The last decade was a masterclass in performative virtue: endless apologies, photo ops in blackface (whoops), and a war chest drained on Ukraine while Canadians couldn’t afford rent. Carney’s cut from the same cloth, only he’s got a fancier CV to wave around. He’s already cozying up to the war hawks, signaling he’ll keep the Ukraine gravy train rolling—because nothing says “Canadian values” like funneling billions into a conflict with no end while our own borders crumble. Same extreme views, same obsession with looking good on the world stage, same refusal to face the chaos at home. Trudeau’s team didn’t vanish; they just swapped the pretty boy for the banker. Meet the new boss, same as the old boss.
Let’s talk about his track record, not what I would call idea. At the Bank of England, Carney was the golden boy who couldn’t quite stick to the landing. Forward guidance on interest rates? A flop, markets got confused, and he looked like a weatherman predicting sunshine in a gad dam hurricane. Brexit forecasts? He spooked the public with doom and gloom, only to have Eurosceptics like Jacob Rees-Mogg call him out for turning the bank into a political soapbox. Brits still argue over whether he was a steady hand or a sanctimonious meddler—check Reddit if you don’t believe me. The point is, this guy’s not the flawless genius he pontificates. He’s a climber, a charmer, a narcissistic man who’s failed upward into power, and now we’re the ones potentially stuck with the bill, really do you want to risk four more years of killing our economy.
Wake the F up!!!! Canada: we don’t need another decade of this. We don’t need a Prime Minister whose moral compass spins like an off-center roulette wheel, pointing wherever the globalists and green lobbyists tell it to. Carney’s not here to fix our problems, he’s here to polish his legacy while we drown in debt, war, and climate dogma that’s more about optics than reality all the while, like Tredeau, grows his net worth. This is what happens when you let competence erode under the weight of ideology when you trade truth for narrative, or in plainer terms, it’s what happens when you don’t learn from the last ten years of Trudeau’s bloody take it up the ars, clown show. Carney can’t stay. He’s not a leader; he’s a liability. Time to rip off the mask and send this vampire back to the boardroom where he belongs, before he bleeds us dry.
marksdeepthoughts.ca 
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